When I was 18 I thought: I’m annoying, I’m shy, and I think I know everything. I have got to change. So I moved myself out of my comfort zone, moved out of home, and made new friends. I stopped listening to my parents, and I didn’t let narcissism and fear hold me back.
The idea was to work on developing my personality, typically the hardest thing to change about you, by watching what I did and didn’t like about other people and recognizing what I did and didn’t like within myself. I suppose I was modeling myself on characteristics of people I admired or thought were laid back and “cool”. I thought it would only take a few years, but here I am at 26, no longer modeling myself on others (especially just because I think they’re cool), but still trying to control and acknowledge my bad points and irradiate or improve on them.
What I didn’t realize at 18, and what I am only just beginning to realize now, is that self improvement isn’t a liner progression, it’s a lifelong struggle. But, I think I’m up to it. I think I had already achieved something when, at 18, I realized that I’m not faultless.
And thank god for that. How else would I learn?
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